Welcome, dear reader, to THE VAULT: that magical, special place, accessible only to those with the wisdom, foresight, and financial wherewithal to join the Uncivil Union.
Are you already a member? Then wait no longer:
But, let's say you haven't joined the Union yet. It's understandable: there's a financial cost to it, and, let's face it, the world is a shitshow right now and every last shred of currency you have must go to only those things that keep you alive, improve the world, and make you happy.
I get it. And I respect it. That's why, here, on this page, on this entryway to the mysteries of THE VAULT, I will take some time to explain to you the many and varied, ever-growing benefits of becoming part of the collective:
- You will receive immediate access to every game I've ever written! That's right: such incredible, timeless gems of the TTRPG world as the original 3 Goblins in a Trenchcoat, and the expansion! The sweet, melancholy solo journaling game Cats & Corpses, and its sequel, Cats & Corpses 2: Attack and Dethrone Dog! The weird one-offs like Cupid, Inc.! The first two games in the Last Library series, Hometown Magic and the most recent, Seeker's Call! All this and more, yours for just a buck a month, holy fuckballs!
- BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE yes indeed, check this shit out: you'll get access to my current Works In Progress (that's WIP, for the less design-savvy among us). That's right, deep within THE VAULT (available exclusively to members of the Uncivil Union), you'll find secret links to living documents. You will behold the very act of creation itself, a truly stunning glimpse into my creative process that will both illuminate, and reveal, the deepest secrets of my design philosophy.
- OH NO HE'S STILL GOING hell yeah I am, you think I could ever make a list and leave it at 2 points? NO. There's a third thing and here it is, because I know you. I know that just 2 things (regardless of how impressive they are, after all, point 1 includes OVER $30 WORTH OF GAMES for the sheer pittance that is a single American dollar, while point 2 gives you access to a POTENTIALLY UNLIMITED FONT OF PURE CREATIVE JUICE) isn't enough for a person of your taste. Your caliber. No, you don't get out of bed for anything less than 3 things, and here's that 3rd: members of the Uncivil Union are first in line now and always for all my other creative endeavors. Am I making a video? Y'all are seeing it first. Guess who's on the list for people who get to playtest my games? That's right, it's you, comrade! Have we come up with a new technology called 'squirts' in which you inhale a specific chemical cocktail that delivers a personalized virtual experience directly to your brain? FUCK YEAH YOU BET YOU'RE GETTING THAT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE TOO, FRIEND.
I think by this point we're both pretty clear: joining the Uncivil Union is, quite possibly, the greatest decision you can make, as a person. Do it. Enter THE VAULT.